It's time for us to call out the world's biggest failures. The Medical industry has sat on their fat, impotent asses trying to make them thin and virile for far too long. People suffer every day, but fifty + year old men can get boners. That's totally fair.
But what makes their apparent priority issue worse is the overwhelming amount a fluid currently trying to work its way out of me. I'm only human, and therefore can only prevent these fluids from seeping out of two, maybe three orifices at a time.
And why must I suffer so? Because some dude's boner is more important than my cold. Whatever.
The common cold has plagued mankind for millenia, and these fuckers have let it slip by uncured. And why? Because the money's in the treatment! Don't give me your "The Common cold is a constantly shifting virus that never occurs the same way twice" because you're just part of the conspiracy to keep my head foggy and hurty. I recommend that all readers refuse to pay their copays, and steal any necessary medication (from dumpsters if neccessary) until the cure for the common cold is discovered. Refuse doctor's care if possible, because they must be held responsible.
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