Ted Haggard: Heterosexual with Complications

Bullshit. I mean seriously, you had sex with a male prostitute/crystal meth dealer AND masturbated in front of a teenage boy from your church. Then you admit that you've struggled with these feelings since high school? Guess what, Ted: you are a homosexual. That is what that means. There is no such thing as "Heterosexual with complications." Your sexuality is not a facebook relationship.

Here is where this gets me though. In the eyes of this dickwad, homosexuality is a sin, a sin that will send its sinner to a deep part of hell. So is adultery. But those are beside the point because if there is a God, He doesn't care about where your dick goes really (though the adultery thing is pretty fucked up). What He'd really pissed off is that while you are going around finding gay crystal meth dealers with whom to have sex and do crystal meth, you were trying to control the U.S. government to create policies that actively persecute that gay crystal meth dealer.

To the rest of the world: If Ted Haggard is right, and there is this very specific vision of hell going down, we can all rest assured that he will be in a far worse part of it than the sodomites. As a schismatic, he'll be forced to walk in a circle for all eternity where at one point he is cut nearly in half, then painfully heals until he reaches that point again. Thank God for loopholes.

Oh man, not this again!

So seriously, Brian Fallon.

That's all.

Yo, seriously

Green Day rules. I don't know why I always go through the "oh I was a kid then" thing with these guys, but they write some seriously good punk rock. Some day they'll be in the conversation with Ramones and the Clash.

Innauguration Day

So today, a guy I like is becoming the President. I think it's pretty cool, personally. It's at the very least a step in the right direction for the country, and it will set "race" (race isn't a real thing folks, it's an arbitrary set of features that some dudes from Europe created to be able to enslave the formerly non-christians that they turned into christians, but this is another topic for another jazzebration) relations in this country forward by leaps and bounds.

But I just want to get something out there that's been on my mind for a while. Through the course of my political and philosophical wanderings, I have seen politics from a number of perspectives, and I am just now content to lay my philosophy out. There will always be rulers and there will always be the ruled. If that isn't the case, we're all going to revert to killing each other to get basic needs, and just sort of generally being shitty.

There is only so much that each person is capable of controlling in the realm of big P politics, and opinions differ greatly on what each person's effect should be. I think the break down of left and right has gotten silly because we all basically have the same goals, just different ways we want to go about achieving them.

So I intend to buck big P politics. That's not to say I won't participate, I believe that's important. But to think that I have the power to change the relationship between the rulers and the ruled is ridiculous. I want to focus on the little things that I can change, that we all can change. The biggest weapon any one person wields is their money, so know where your money goes, donate to charity. If you don't like corporations, don't give them your money; buy from smaller suppliers. And basically, don't be a dick.

I hope Barack Obama can help change the bigger stuff. That's why I voted for him. Me, I'm just going to try to not be a dick.

Sarah Palin

So, this lady hasn't disappeared, and I'm starting to worry that she won't disappear. All the exaggerations from the election period aside, this woman represents everything bad about the right in this country. Anyway, this website has some funny stuff on it. Thanks McCain. For all the things you've done in your political career, this is at the top of the "Man, What the fuck, man?!" list.

RIP Ron Asheton

So Ron Asheton was found dead today. Listen to Fun House real loud.

Asshats of the year!

So, list 2.

This one is for asshats of the year.

5. Ben Weasel - He has worked with the All American Rejects in the past yet had the unmitigated gall to call the Lawrence Arms the worst band in the world. The man who wrote such insightful lyrics as "You smelly butt, why don't you go away?" compared the Lawrence Arms' lyrics to High School Poetry.

4. Anyone who voted for John McCain - You're only asshats now. It would be much worse if he had won.

3. Dan Grabauskas - Fuck him. You all should know why.

2. That asshat from Shaw's - See my letter to him.

1. Kevin Bright - This guy did some shit, created friends, created Joey, then had to go back to his old college (Emerson, which I am attending) to ruin the educational experiences of all those who cross his path. I worked with him, and I hate him. He is on a very shortlist of all time asshats. Fuck him until he bleeds.